5 real Romeos – Time to vomit!
5 real Romeos – Time to vomit!
Post by sayonara on Oct 11, 2005, 8:03pm
It should be titled:
5 Unenlightened Pussified American Males
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5 real Romeos, 5 surprise proposals
By Cynthia Hanson
Which four little words will change a man’s life forever? (“I’ll have a Bud” doesn’t count.) Try, “Will you marry me?” Not merely a question, a marriage proposal is the climax of a totally (and hopefully perfectly) choreographed surprise. Here’s how five men popped the question — and made their beloved pop a gasket.
Romeo #1:
Jennifer and I are big fans of BR5-49, a Southern rockabilly band, so I decided to propose at one of their gigs. Between sets, I found two of the musicians outside the club. I told them I planned to propose to my girlfriend that night and asked them to read a fake song-request note I’d written before they played her favorite song. The note said: “I’ve got a gal here from South Carolina who loves the song ‘Hickory Wind.’ I was hoping you could play that for her and help me ask her to be my wife. Her name is Jennifer, my name is Will.” While they were reading it, the whole club went dead quiet. After a couple of seconds, Jennifer looked over at me, and I raised my hand. The spotlight came up on me; everyone on the dance floor moved back. I got down on my knee, took the ring out of my pocket, and said, “Jennifer, will you be my wife?” She started crying. Then she got down on one knee, held my face in her hands, and said, “Of course.” Then she kissed me. One of the guys onstage yelled, “Get a room!”
Romeo #2:
I proposed to Jessica on the beach in Miami at 1 a.m., after a wedding. She was cranky and tired, but I convinced her to take a walk with me. She didn’t think anything was up — she thought I was just being annoying. Once we got to the beach, I waited for Jessica’s mood to improve, and then I started talking about all our good times and how much I loved her — and why. I guess I overdid it, because she said, “What’s going on?” I reached into my pocket, pulled out the diamond ring, and said, “Jessica, will you marry me?” Her reply was, “Are you kidding?” I told her to just answer the question. She said yes. And cried. Then we sat on the beach and watched the sun come up.
Romeo #3:
Jackie knew I had the ring — we picked it out together — but I still wanted the proposal to be a complete surprise. The only place I didn’t think she’d expect it was at her office, so I asked her boss to help me arrange it. He agreed to schedule a fake meeting with her so she’d be in her office when I arrived. As I walked in, Jackie turned red and said, “What are you doing here?” Apparently, she thought her boss was going to be mad. Instead, he left the office. I closed the door and said, “What do you think I’m doing here?” Jackie started shaking uncontrollably. I hugged her, but it didn’t help. She continued to shake — to the point where I thought she’d collapse — so I got down on my knee, pulled out the ring, and launched into my proposal. Her hand shook as I slid the ring onto her finger, and her eyes filled with tears. She was speechless.
Romeo #4:
I wanted Amanda to be totally surprised when I proposed, so I started with a movie and a casual dinner at one of our favorite little spots in Virginia Beach. As we ordered dessert, I knew she didn’t have a clue what I was planning. After dinner we went miniature golfing — one of her favorite summertime activities. Conveniently, the miniature golf course was very close to the beach. I suggested a stroll. We went to a secluded spot on the beach and began walking. Amanda didn’t realize it, but I was carrying a towel and had tucked a card into my shorts. Somehow, I extricated the card, slowed my pace to let her get just slightly ahead of me, put the towel on the sand, dropped to my knee, and called her name. When she spun around, I was holding the card out to her. At that moment, she probably sensed that this was it. Inside the card was a poem I had written — six verses about us and love. The last line was, “Will you marry me?” When she looked up from the card — with tears streaming down her face — I presented the ring. By now it was pitch black on the beach, so, with Amanda still crying, we ran up the beach toward a porch light for a better look. Apparently, she liked what she saw. We were married ten months later.
Romeo #5:
I took Donna to New Orleans for her 29th birthday. She knew I planned to propose there, so my challenge was to do it in an unexpected way. I made dinner reservations at Galatoire’s, one of the most famous restaurants in the city, and before we left the hotel room I gave Donna a book of sonnets. On the front of the book, I posted a note that directed her to specific pages, until she reached a sonnet by Christopher Marlowe that begins, “Live with me and be my love.” That one said it all. I put a note there that directed her to the nightstand, where I’d left a small box. Donna started crying as she opened it and saw the diamond-and-sapphire engagement ring. In fact, she cried all through dinner. I wanted to tell the waiter that we just got engaged, but Donna was so excited and overwhelmed that she refused to talk about it.
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Re: 5 real Romeos – Time to vomit!
Post by XXX on Oct 11, 2005, 8:13pm
With the money you spent on the engagement ring, you could have spended it on high-class escorts (the ones that look like models and charge $1000 an hour) lots of them! 
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Re: 5 real Romeos – Time to vomit!
Post by nastyrobot on Oct 11, 2005, 8:55pm
On the plus side, looks like 4 new MRAs.
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Re: 5 real Romeos – Time to vomit!
Post by XXX on Oct 11, 2005, 9:04pm
What’s MRA’s???
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Re: 5 real Romeos – Time to vomit!
Post by HappilySingle on Oct 11, 2005, 9:12pm
MRA = Men’s Rights Activists.
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Re: 5 real Romeos – Time to vomit!
Post by marco on Oct 11, 2005, 9:21pm
Its like reading bad horror stories, so creepy…
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Re: 5 real Romeos – Time to vomit!
Post by thechief on Oct 11, 2005, 10:12pm
Actually all these stories would’ve been quite charming–in a different culture, in a different time, when women still knew how to be women and the courts didn’t give them every incentive to go for a no-fault divorce and….
Oh, never mind. It’s getting late, I’m tired, and you all know the whole routine anyway…
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Re: 5 real Romeos – Time to vomit!
Post by sirlancelot on Oct 12, 2005, 6:01am
Idiots, idiots, idiots, idiots, idiots, idiots, idiots, idiots, idiots, idiots!
I have infinite sympathy for men who married years ago and ended up divorced and stripped of their cash, children and assets. However, I have difficulty feeling very sympathetic for men who got married within the last five-years or so and end up screwed over by divorce courts. Men should damn well know these days what they’re getting into, that the odds are stacked against them in the highly likely event of a divorce, and they should not be so foolish to think that the cupcake swooning over the big diamond ring today will never be capable of filing for divorce on a whim, making a false DV report and setting the divorce lawyers onto them.
It’s not that men getting married these days deserve to be shafted in a divorce court of course, but they really should know better.
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