37M….No way in hell will I become a slave.
37M….No way in hell will I become a slave.
Post by Chap Johnson on Jan 16, 2006, 7:52pm
Hi There
I’m a 37 year old male who never married. After seeing what my older brother went through a few years back when he divorced, I experienced much of what you’ve shared second hand.
No way in hell will I become a slave. There are two opposite reactions from my acquaintances.
- I am highly intelligent.
- Fear- like there must be something wrong with me, or gay which clearly is NOT the case!
Finally, thank you for taking the time to assemble this piece.
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Re: 37M….No way in hell will I become a slave.
Post by Evergreen on Jan 16, 2006, 8:03pm
Almost all the married men will envy us and say if they have to do this all over again, they will stay single, in control and be free.
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Re: 37M….No way in hell will I become a slave.
Post by travis on Jan 16, 2006, 8:15pm
Andrea Dworkin often compared marriage with slavery. I guess we can agree with her there.
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Re: 37M….No way in hell will I become a slave.
Post by PR on Jan 17, 2006, 12:47am
It is sad that you are allowing what happened to your older brother to influence your decisions to remain single. Granted, there are some psycho women out there, but surely if you look for a good women, even one from overseas if you get really desperate, you can have a family of your own. Don’t see it as ’slavery’ like many of the guys here do, they simply chose wrongly, made a mistake, and paid the price for their bad choice. You can be different, and use your brains to screen them until you find a woman you feel best fits your need.
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Re: 37M….No way in hell will I become a slave.
Post by AppleJack on Jan 17, 2006, 12:52am
Jan 17, 2006, 12:47am, PR wrote:
It is sad that you are allowing what happened to your older brother to influence your decisions to remain single. Granted, there are some psycho women out there, but surely if you look for a good women, even one from overseas if you get really desperate, you can have a family of your own. Don’t see it as ’slavery’ like many of the guys here do, they simply chose wrongly, made a mistake, and paid the price for their bad choice. You can be different, and use your brains to screen them until you find a woman you feel best fits your need.
Maybe if you’d used your brains you wouldn’t be sitting there all ignorant and watching television with your cats, troll.
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Re: 37M….No way in hell will I become a slave.
Post by Niall NLIT on Jan 17, 2006, 4:45am
‘even one from overseas if you get really desperate’
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Re: 37M….No way in hell will I become a slave.
Post by Chris in Korea on Jan 17, 2006, 4:56am
Jan 16, 2006, 8:03pm, Evergreen wrote:
Almost all the married men will envy us and say if they have to do this all over again, they will stay single, in control and be free.
Actually many of them won’t say that. Some will admit it but many will not. They have too much pride to admit they screwed up by getting married. Nobody likes to admit that they made a huge mistake that will affect them for the rest of their lives. Nobody wants to admit they were swindled into believing that you have to get married because it is just part of life. But deep down inside the overwhelming majority of men feel like we do. I’ve been divorced once and had to learn the hard way that marriage to a modern woman was a mistake.
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Re: 37M….No way in hell will I become a slave.
Post by Niall NLIT on Jan 17, 2006, 6:35am
Chris,
I admit to all of it. I was a damn fool who married a woman who if ‘red flag‘ was in the dictionary it would have a picture of her next to it.
Managed to get out without a major at the time wallet hit but recovered and am now doing fine.
Some guys are living in their cars because of what they did, others kill themselves, so I am not the worst off victim but:
NEVER AGAIN!
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Re: 37M….No way in hell will I become a slave.
Post by ddg on Jan 17, 2006, 8:14am
I’ve been married before and I wouldn’t even consider doing it again. It’s been 11 years since me and my ex split-my divorce was legally finalized in ‘98-and I enjoy being single and free a lot more than being married.
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Re: 37M….No way in hell will I become a slave.
Post by Chris in Korea on Jan 17, 2006, 8:16am
Jan 17, 2006, 6:35am, Niall NLIT wrote:
Chris,I admit to all of it. I was a damn fool who married a woman who if ‘red flag’ was in the dictionary it would have a picture of her next to it.
Managed to get out with a major at the time wallet hit but recovered and am now doing fine.
Some guys are living in their cars because of what they did, others kill themselves, so I am not the worst off victim but:
NEVER AGAIN!
My ex wife should also have a picture next to Red Flag in the dictionary. My ex has never met her biological father and my ex mother in law is on her 5th marriage. All 5 of those marriages were by the time my ex was 12! My ex didn’t have a clue what a marriage was other than meaning she had access to my wallet. My ex mother in law has only kept the current husband around for so long because he is going to inherit a large chunk of cash when his parents die. Also when I found out my ex had well over 20 grand in credit card debt I should have ran the other way. But did I? Nope. I married her instead.
Oh well, live and learn. I was also lucky and managed to escape without too bad of a financial loss and I thank God everyday that we didn’t have kids. The day the divorce was final I felt like a new person and life was sweet again.
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Re: 37M….No way in hell will I become a slave.
Post by CP on Jan 17, 2006, 9:58am
Jan 17, 2006, 12:47am, PR wrote:
It is sad that you are allowing what happened to your older brother to influence your decisions to remain single. Granted, there are some psycho women out there, but surely if you look for a good women, even one from overseas if you get really desperate, you can have a family of your own. Don’t see it as ’slavery’ like many of the guys here do, they simply chose wrongly, made a mistake, and paid the price for their bad choice. You can be different, and use your brains to screen them until you find a woman you feel best fits your need.
This whole blame yourself attitude ignores one basic thing…
People change!!!
She did, I did, hell, everyone we knew changed in one way or another over the two decades we were together. Anyone who expects that the people involved will remain as they were when they met is deluding themselves big time. The big difference is that change doesn’t necessarily mean growth, either as individuals or as people. Relationships and marriage require effort from both parties in order to work; some kind of mutual meeting of the minds in the pursuit of life together. It just so happens that women are given carte blanche to make decisions that are beneficial to herself without any thought to the partner she has. Even her children will in some way become third-or fourth-order considerations to her whims. This is the paradigm that is in place and encouraged. The others that are supposed to be a part of her life have no voices, no recourse, and not one ally to hear them. It’s so easy to say “Oh, you chose wrongly. Suck it up and try again” but as the saying goes, “Once Bitten, Twice Shy”.
I don’t care how sweet and wonderful any woman is when one meets her and falls in love with her. Sooner or later, she’ll get a visit from the Entitlement Fairy and you will be expected to remain silent and just become another piece of furniture to support her ass.
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Re: 37M….No way in hell will I become a slave.
Post by Pernicious on Jan 17, 2006, 11:35am
If marriage constitutes slavery for women, divorce must constitute slavery for men…
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Re: 37M….No way in hell will I become a slave.
Post by thechief on Jan 17, 2006, 11:47am
Jan 17, 2006, 11:35am, Pernicious wrote:
If marriage constitutes slavery for women, divorce must constitute slavery for men…
One of the best quotes from Matthew Weeks.
Oh, and PR…I’ll say it out loud, as many times as you want.
Marrying my wife was a mistake. Marrying my wife was a mistake.
Marrying my wife was a mistake. Marrying my wife was a mistake.
Marrying my wife was a mistake. Marrying my wife was a mistake.
Marrying my wife was a mistake. Marrying my wife was a mistake.
I’ll even say it was MY mistake, or at least as much mine as it was hers. I was 21. It was 1990, and we didn’t have this site and others like it warning us just how bad it could get. I’d bought in to all the bullshit our media, our culture and my religion at the time taught me about marriage.
It was a mistake. I’m now determined not to make it again, and to warn other men against it.
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Re: 37M….No way in hell will I become a slave.
Post by Me on Jan 17, 2006, 1:02pm
You don’t have to be sour and burnt. You can try again. You can give the relationship thing another go.
Just don’t MARRY.
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Re: 37M….No way in hell will I become a slave.
Post by openeyes on Jan 17, 2006, 5:33pm
Lately I’ve felt there are some people that may be worth living with for at least a little while, but that requires at most a “living together” contract, not a marriage license. Anything more than that can get rather messy, and I simply hope to see beyond my 21 year old male hormones
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Re: 37M….No way in hell will I become a slave.
Post by Max on Jan 17, 2006, 9:38pm
Never let a woman know how much money you have. Always act like you’re poor so you can see if they really care about you or if they’re a psychopath gold digging bitch. If they won’t accept you as “poor” they don’t like you for the right reasons. Ditch them and look for a good woman.
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Re: 37M….No way in hell will I become a slave.
Post by Ajax on Jan 18, 2006, 3:17am
So now you assume that all women who ditch you because you are ‘poor’ are gold-digging?
They are merely looking after their future and that of their future offspring, they want them to be well looked after and they want security. Nothing wrong with that. That is how the world works.
Women from all around the world want the best provider they can get, even ‘asians’… Go ask any woman this. It is a fact.
Ask yourself: what woman in her right mind would want to settle down with a ‘poor’ guy who will not be able to support her and any children they might have? Virtually, none.
Wealth is to women: what beauty is to men: A commodity.
p.s. she can still ‘love you’ but love never paid the bills.
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Re: 37M….No way in hell will I become a slave.
Post by sirlancelot on Jan 18, 2006, 4:24am
Jan 18, 2006, 3:17am, Ajax wrote:
So now you assume that all women who ditch you because you are ‘poor’ are gold-digging?
Yes, we are. Simple as that. A woman who judges a guy on how much he earns is a gold-digger and a whore.
Quote:They are merely looking after their future and that of their future offspring, they want them to be well looked after and they want security.
Fair enough, but that only applied up until a generation or two ago. That’s not how it works any more. Women have careers now, they have education systems all bent out of shape to suit them, they have affirmative action to push them into jobs over men…they can fucking well provide for themselves. This is the point men here are making – women won’t do anything for us and we’re regarded as evil misogynists for wanting a woman to cook and clean for us, so fine….we won’t do anything for them either. They can support themselves.
Quote:That is how the world works.
That’s how it used to work. Now women don’t bring anything whatsoever into relationships and marriage so we’re not going to either. Protect and provide for women? Hah! Fuck that.
Quote:Ask yourself: what woman in her right mind would want to settle down with a ‘poor’ guy who will not be able to support her and any children they might have? Virtually, none.
The point is that most guys here – certainly me – are able to support a woman and any children we might have, but we’re not going to. Because the bitch can divorce us and we will still have to support her as she goes off with her new lover.
Quote:Wealth is to women: what beauty is to men: A commodity.
But men are considered sexist and shallow for judging women on beauty, so that makes women sexist and shallow for judging men on wealth, right?
You’re living in the past I’m afraid. Women broke their end of the bargain when they declared they weren’t going to do any of that domestic work, so we’re under no obligation to keep our end of the bargain which was to provide for them. Women are on their own, stuck trying to pay their own way through life, which is right where they said they wanted to be. It’s not men’s problem if they’re changing their minds. Tough.
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Re: 37M….No way in hell will I become a slave.
Post by solshinobi on Jan 18, 2006, 12:03pm
^^^ Agreed 100%.
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Re: 37M….No way in hell will I become a slave.
Post by Ajax on Jan 18, 2006, 2:21pm
But if you go to Asia and other non-feminized countries, what I wrote still applies, It isn’t something of the ‘past’… Think about that. Besides, you said ‘appear poor’ that means no money at all… hardly a good hooking technique if you want women…
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Re: 37M….No way in hell will I become a slave.
Post by Richie Rich on Jan 18, 2006, 7:19pm
p.s. she can still ‘love you’ but love never paid the bills.
-Ajax
….Sounds like someone is too comfortable with being a walking ATM machine!!!
Do you happen to live around many American black women?
I hear this exact cliche saying from them more than rap music in the hood. It is also the reason why men hump & dump their asses faster than any other women out there because they let men know it is the dollar bill and not the man who is relevant.
I understand what you are saying. No woman in the world wants a poor man but the levels of extreme are far worse in North America and Western Europe due to materialism/consumerism. AW/ WW WILL cost more from the start than other types of women. However, by bowing/accepting money hungry bitches catering list you are doomed from start to finish!!!
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Re: 37M….No way in hell will I become a slave.
Post by Ajax on Jan 19, 2006, 12:27am
True.
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