Any Good Marriages?
Any Good Marriages?
Post by myachingback on Yesterday at 11:06pm
Here’s 2 cents from an older guy (55).
Let’s run down my friends from high school.
Mark: successful character actor. Dumped by several long-term sweethearts as a young guy (1 broke off their engagement and married a very rich guy; 1 live-in returned to her old beau, a radio personality and alcoholic and overall bad guy, but with money). Mark married for the first time last year at 54.
Chuck: married at 25; wife was a nut job. He worked as an auto salesman by day, went to law school at night, she slept, applied makeup, and spent whatever money there was. He stayed out of guilt for 14 years, divorced her, remarried an unattractive but much better woman. They have 1 child, now a teen, he’s a small town criminal defense lawyer (DUIs, misdemeanors mostly) and she worked part-time painting interiors and hanging wallpaper until recently. That marriage is tolerable — she’s kind of a nice person — but no great shakes. Oh, but she DOES cook and screw.
Rob T.: very talented musician. Married a lapsed Mormon girl when he was in his early 30s. She was seriously nuts, claimed to have been molested by every male relative she had (true? I don’t know) but she was a real beast to my friend. Marriage ran about 8 years. Today, he dates much younger women and I don’t think has any wish to re-marry.
Bobby: stoned to about age 30, ditched by two spoiled, materialistic wives (#1 a Jewish princess, #2 a hard-eyed corporate bitch). OK, he wasn’t any great shakes as a younger guy. At about age 35 he took wife #3, a much younger woman. She popped 3 kids, never had a job, is nice to him. From a strictly financial standpoint it helped that her Dad died young and left her some hundreds of thousands of dollars, so they have a house they’d never afford on what he makes (although he does fairly well and is a hard worker) (greater NY area is awfully expensive).
Bob C.: Turned out to be gay.
Rick: Doctor, taken to cleaners by wife #1 but she cashed out before he made a lot of money or had any kids. Wife #2 isn’t interested in him sexually or otherwise; despite being a mildly left-wing sort of guy he couldn’t help but make enough money to live in a pricey suburb. He fucks his college girlfriend once or twice a year on the sly. His only child with wife #2 is in rehab following a calamitous car crash. Rick deserves better.
Gordon: successful banker, married college girlfriend, has a gallows sense of humour, doesn’t hate her, his parents divorced fairly late on and I won’t be surprised if he does, too. The kids, three I think, are in their 20s.
Me: married knocked-up girlfriend at 19, divorced a year later, #2 ditched me after 4 years, no kids, #3 overspends, stopped sex several years ago, refuses to have a job, doesn’t cook, is a decent but not exemplary mother. We interact as little as we can, occasionally she becomes verbally abusive, if the shared-parenting (joint custody) bill gets passed by the NY Legislature, I will probably go for it.
John B.: Married high school girlfriend, 1 kid, she ditched him after about 15 years, took kid and moved to Florida. He moved down there to be near his daughter.
When I graduated from high school (1968) I knew 1 kid whose parents were divorced. (A number of divorces did happen after my friends were out of the nest).
Today, at 55, excepting Bobby (above) I know no husbands who are doing better than “what the hell, where am I gonna go?” and I can’t offhand think of anyone I grew up with (of either sex, and I had a lot of friends of both sexes) who married before age 25, stayed married to his/her first spouse, had kids, stayed married, and would rate his/her marriage overall as better than “Fair.” Indeed, I can only name 1 or two who have 20 year marriages that are intact and better than Quiet Desperation.
The women at least get money, property, and some break in the relentlessness of the career grind. I adore my kids, but that’s all I’m getting. I fucked up. Don’t do it!
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Re: Any Good Marriages?
Post by Drifter on Today at 3:14am
Sometimes, after reading a bunch of Renee wannabes, I wonder why I visit this site.
Then I find a classic post like this. You can’t buy this kind of insight.
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Re: Any Good Marriages?
Post by Niall IB on Today at 6:03am
Have posted this before but happy to do so again.
I married a wacko. Hold my hands up I should have seen it coming. Divorced got cleaned out but young so not that much to clean out. No kids as she was anorexic and had maybe 1 period in 5 years of marriage. Me? Never again. Sport fuck but thats it.
EVERYONE I know divorced except two:
1. My best friend. CFO of a Fortune 100 company. Married late 30’s to skank with one kid. She popped out another his son who he lives for. He spends his life on his knees. Cupcake does not work they have maids, baby minders, gardeners etc. Never lifts a finger. Sex cut off after his baby born. She looks great as she is toned plucked Armanied to within an inch of her life on his money but he don’t get to touch. Despite making huge bucks he is in debt big time due to her spending and GET THIS does not have a cash card. He has to ASK her for money. Ultimately he is OK with things as he adores his son. Doubt she will cash out as she has everything she whats as is probably fucking the gardener or someone on the side. She has made a few passes at me. Not a life I could lead but not my choice.
2. My older brother. Married high school sweetheart. Had two kids young. Bought property before the Cali boom. He works middle level job as a transport manager. Shes a nurse. Kids now in there 20s, nice kids I throw them a few bucks now and then but they are both slackers no hoper’s still living at home and who are occasionally employed in McJobs but mostly not. Little money due to still supporting the kids. She is OK but FAT and I mean proper American HUGE. Sex stopped years ago and he’s happy about that. He feels he has wasted his life and says to me if I had my time again no marriage and no kids.
Pretty depressing picture but thats it.
Men marry because they are scared they will die alone. But with divorce in Cali running at 80%+ likely even if you do marry you will still end up alone but with no money and that ain’t a good place to be.
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Re: Any Good Marriages?
Post by khankrumthebulgar on Today at 6:58am
In 1996 I was working in North Texas in the Flooring Industry. I had owned a Floor Covering Franchise before my Divorce to ex Mrs. Khan #1. She is now married to my Store Manager who is Step Father to my Children. He treats them with real love and kindness and is a genuine good guy. This is the best scenario in an otherwise shitty situation. Ex wife Ballooned to 300+ lbs. Then I paid for Gastioplasty procedure
which cost $19K and she decided to have a fling.
I met an Attorney who was a Mediator. He told me about a buddy of his living in Plano. He was a top Orthopedic Surgeon. He left to go to a Conference where he was speaking. Came home unexpectedly. Saw his Buddy’s Porsche in the garage. Heard his wife and Buddy going at like to Animals. Her Legs up in the air over his Buddy’s Shoulders. His wife cleaned him out.
I have heard this scenario over and over again here in the Bible Belt. Women cashing out on Husbands. It is a stinking epidemic. When the economy crashed after the Internet Bubble Burst and the Telecom Sector crashed. The Divorce Lawyers cleaned up. The Party was over so to speak. I was working a second Job at Lowe’s. Half the staff came from the IT Sector in our store. Half.
They were making a third of what they had made prior in the IT sector. Network Administrators, Software Engineers, Programmers etc. It was shocking to see how many were out of work. And Alcatel, Nortel, Allegiance Telecom and others had laid off a bunch of people.
My advice to younger Guys is this learn two skills. There is always a need for Welders, Plumbers, Mechanics etc. Learn two job skills not one. Being able to be flexible is important if you want to stay solvent. Many folks who bet the Farm on a particular skill set may have to adapt to changing Market conditions.
I went with a Buddy to an upscale watering hole in 2005 and was attacked by 30 something Women desperate for Male companionship. I ignored them and had them actually competing for my attention. They were actually quite attractive and were very open about wanting to get laid with no strings attached… yeah right. At 49 my big head does my thinking for me not the little one. Desperation with the thirty something AW who has the Baby Rabies can be smelled. Run far Run fast but Run.
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Re: Any Good Marriages?
Post by romulus on Today at 10:13am
I’ll add my 2 cents here. I’m in my late 20’s, finishing up grad school. Most of my friends are either married or in long term relationships. Of those who married, all of them are stressed out manginas. Some have had their first kids and are expecting #2. Complete wage slaves and the stress is killing these guys. In one situation, the wife stopped working and developed a psycho-physical condition where she can’t stand sunlight (yes, she covers all the windows in the house with curtains to not let in any sunlight during the day). Not only that, she does absolutely nothing – won’t even make the kids lunches in the morning. He is stuck working full time AND doing ALL domestic duties. A complete mangina, it’s pathetic. The stress was killing him until recently when they moved to a better house in a lower cost of living area. I can think of only one friend who is completely happy and this is why: 1) no kids – wife may not be able to have children due to a medical condition and 2) he married a girl with the mindset that she have good “wife” qualities and that’s what he found.
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Re: Any Good Marriages?
Post by kestral on Today at 2:24pm
I’m 32 and two of my friends around the same age are married. I was best man at both. Plus an older friend who is married.
Guy 1: Married with two children, luckily they married 6 years ago and bought a house and the house has appreciated nicely. I think the love is still there but wife stopped working when they had their kids which was the big issue and that caused a lot of financial issues but she’s going back to work so things are getting better. But she’s definitely in control of the relationship (something I could not handle).
Guy 2: Married last year, that’s the one I mentioned in the thread with the Muslim princess. He had dated her for 4 years and by year 1.5 she was already putting the screws on to marry. He suggested living together first and of course she said no way, that’s living in sin yada yada yada. So they got married and within the first week they came back from the honeymoon they started arguing. Why? Because cupcake did not expect my friend to be as messy as he is yada yada yada. Of course, he reminds her, if they had lived together first she would have known and could make an informed choice. Cupcake wants kids NOT but he says travel first so she’s trying to quickly do a quick travel trip and then go directly to kids. He says no way. We’ll see if he caves.
Guy 3: Married for 20 years. He’s a musician and he plays guitar/sings and I used to back him on keyboards. He’s in his early 40’s hasn’t had sex with his wife in YEARS. When I see the wedding pictures I am blown away. She was stick skinny when they married, now she’s fat, we’re talking even fatter than the average AW fat. I couldn’t believe it. We got out gigging and you should see, he’s got 20 year old girls that want to do him NOW and of course he can’t cause he’s married. He married his wife when she gave him an ultimatum. Married or we’re through. At the time he was young and not as sure of himself so he married thinking he couldn’t do any better. If he knew that in his 40’s he’d be able to pull 20 year olds I am sure he wouldn’t have married. Has two kids in their early teens.
In any case, I’ve seen all I need to see. Plus my two female cousins who are married (they’re in total control of the relationship), I think that says it all for me. So disappointed. I really thought it was possible to have an ideal relationship but I now know better. Deep down I still want that but I haven’t seen it exist yet, maybe it’s like chasing a fantasy like Santa Claus or the Easter Bunny. Need to get over that.
I think having a rotation of 3 ladies I could see regularly would do the trick. What would also do the trick would be if I could go to Russia and meet girls like that site that AW put up last night and have a good time!!
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